Start Forward, Not Over: Dating With Intention After A Long Term Relationship!
Hey love. If you’re stepping back into the world of dating after a long-term relationship, and you’re feeling a strong desire to just find your person and move forward in a meaningful way already — I see you, and I truly understand how you’re feeling.
It’s completely normal to crave connection after a significant romantic partnership in your life. And I need you to know: you’re absolutely not crazy for wanting that deep, fulfilling bond soon after a breakup or divorce.
When I eventually left a relationship that lasted for over nine years — my heart wanted to dive right into the next chapter of my life.
Subconsciously I didn’t want to casually date like my friends and family were suggesting. I didn’t want to merely see what’s out there, and patiently explore my options. Instead, I wanted to find my person — my life partner, now. I felt more than ready for a family of my own, and I certainly didn’t want to waste any more of my precious time.
And honestly? That desire made complete sense for where I was in life and what my heart was genuinely craving at that moment.
Yet, looking back now with more insight and clarity, I can see that when you’re carrying so much love, so much hope, and yes, heartbreak too, it’s incredibly easy to rush into something that feels excitingly… comfortable — even if it’s not truly the right fit for you.
And girl, I don’t want that for you!
Here’s What I Learned (the messy way):
After leaving that long-term relationship, I thought love would happen fast — like I had earned it, right?!
But deep down, I still had some things I needed to work on. I still thought I had to work for love. I still thought attraction meant compatibility — I hadn’t created my life vision, set my standards or clarified my values.
And when you want babies, a home, and a life partner to experience all of this with, it’s tempting to say, ‘Well… this is good enough.’ But ‘good enough’ can cost you everything you really want — and everything you didn’t know you needed.
If You’re Craving Commitment and Family, Here’s What You Need to Know:
1. Build your life vision first.
Before you invite someone new into your life, it’s essential to get crystal clear on what you truly want your life to look like. Take some time to reflect on your vision, your goals, your standards, and your values — all of these aspects matter more now than ever before.
Remember, your life is yours to design, and the right partner will naturally align with your unique life vision, enhancing your journey together.
Make sure to cultivate a clear understanding of the kind of life you’re going to have and express this authentically in the early dating stages, so men know what your standards are — it will guide you in attracting the love you deserve and it will steer incompatible men away from initiating a serious relationship with you.
2. Trust your timeline — but trust your standards even more.
It’s completely valid to want children soon and to feel that deep yearning to start a family of your own… like yesterday! It’s truly beautiful to envision a home filled with laughter, love, and connection — sooner rather than later. However, keep in mind that rushing into the wrong relationship can cost you far more precious resources, such as time, peace, and happiness, than practicing patience and remaining aligned with your true desires to attract the right life partner.
3. Stay rooted in your feminine energy.
You don’t have to chase after anyone or put yourself in a position where you feel you need to compete for attention. You don’t have to mold yourself into what you think a man wants or change who you are to fit someone else's idea of perfection.
In your softness, in your growing self-confidence, and in understanding your intrinsic worth as a woman — you become truly magnetic to the kind of man who not only wants to pursue you but also wants to build a loving and thriving partnership with you.
You don’t have to force the right connection to happen. Trust that it will naturally flow to you when you embrace and express your authentic self.
4. You are not starting over — you are starting forward.
Everything you’ve lived through, the lessons you’ve learned, the healing you’ve experienced, and all the challenges you’ve overcome have prepared you for this exciting new chapter in your life.
Leaving a long-term relationship does not mean that you have failed in any way. Rather, it signifies that you are strong enough to want more, to wholeheartedly believe in greater possibilities, and to patiently hold out for the kind of relationship that you truly want and deserve.
You absolutely do not have to settle for less than what you want. You don’t have to rush into anything new, even if it feels comfortable and exciting. You certainly don’t have to make yourself excessively available or squeeze yourself into a situation that doesn’t fit you completely and authentically to make something work with someone you’ve just met. In fact, it’s more important now, than ever to be discerning in your early dating experiences with potential life partners.
You can take some time to build a clear life vision, set your standards, heal and patiently attract something real and meaningful for yourself — because you are worth it!
This is what Love Principles is all about — helping women attract love that aligns with the life you want to create.
If you’re ready to attract and keep your dream partner, I would be honored to help guide you there. Because you, my beautiful friend, were never meant to settle for rushed, incompatible or unreciprocated love.
You were meant to attract compatible, long-lasting love with the right life partner.
We appreciate your feedback!
What if every decision you needed to make brought you peace…
Inside the Feminine Decision-Making Guidebook, you’ll learn how to:
Quiet the overthinking
Walk away from misaligned love
Choose what feels GOOD, not what you’re pressured into
Trust yourself in dating, relationships, and life
Because the most powerful decisions a woman can make…
Are the ones that protect her peace.
Ready to Attract & Keep your dream partner?
Sonia Welch Tapley, Certified Dating Coach
When you choose to work with Sonia, you’ll unlock the hidden secrets to attracting real, lasting love—no more exhausting, endless swiping through profiles! Say goodbye to toxic relationships that drain your energy and hello to a vibrant love life that genuinely makes you happy and fulfilled.
Get personalized coaching that’s tailored specifically for you—helping you glow with newfound confidence, set the standards that you deserve, and discover a relationship that truly resonates with your life dreams. It’s time to level up your love life and embrace the possibilities!
Sonia is a Certified Love Coach dedicated to empowering women with the confidence to date with intention, and attract high-quality men who truly align with your dreams and aspirations.
Ever wonder why a guy suddenly goes MIA without any explanation? Curious about how to effortlessly draw in more high-value partners who appreciate you? Not quite sure when to take things to the next level in a budding romance? Don’t worry, because Sonia has all the answers to help you navigate the waters of love like a seasoned pro and build the relationship you truly deserve and desire.
With the comprehensive Love Principles System, she’ll guide you in finding the right kind of partner while gracefully saying bye-bye to the wrong ones—so you can create a love story that’s genuinely worth your precious time. She’ll help you make dating fun, enjoyable, empowering, and totally aligned with your authentic self!
Disclaimer: The dating coaching and information shared on the Love Principles blog are intended for informational and educational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional therapy or mental health services. While we provide insights and strategies to enhance your personal and relational well-being, it is important to consult a licensed mental health professional for any psychological issues or concerns you may have.
